Out of the Chrysalis

I had quite the “wake up call” last night and it is definitely something I felt I needed to share.  It made me question “are we ever really mentally prepared for what is going on in our lives”?  When we see something coming it’s a natural instinct to prepare ourselves for the event.  Let’s use surgery for example we mentally prepare for the surgery itself, the recovery process and how we will be feeling afterward.   Do you think it’s possible to mentally prepare for something that you don’t know is coming?  I didn’t until now.

Last night I stumbled upon a journal I wrote  in 2006, yes a long time ago and I still have it!  Actually it was really a short book that I had written and never had published.  I decided to skim through it and I was amazed and upset by what I found.   When I started reading I was horrified at the thought that maybe I did see my divorce coming somehow and that I had just made excuses for the behavior of my ex.  I contributed a lot of it to his job and I was convinced that’s all it was.  Last night when I read it I truly felt like even though I really didn’t know what was happening at the time, I was mentally preparing myself for the future.

Could I have seen it all coming?  When I wrote that book six years ago did I have the foresight to know how my life was going to change?

What I really want to share with you from this experience is that it is very important to get in touch with your true feelings and emotions.  Obviously six years ago I was not in tune with mine.   I don’t know why I let that journal sit so long before going back and reading it but I’m glad I got it back out.  I think it will make a very good tool in my healing process.

If you are keeping a journal maybe it would be a good idea to go back and read it every once in a while to help you to stay in tune with your emotions.  Sometimes we write things that we cannot say out loud and you may be surprised by how you are feeling emotionally.  You may not even know it until you see it in writing just like I did.

Courageous Butterfly

1/30/12

Here I was enjoying a really bad chick flick tonight when I heard a wonderful quote in the movie

” You can’t stop what’s done to you, you can only survive it”

I immediately thought of the caterpillar who cannot stop its transformation,  but if it has the proper conditions in which to transform survives and becomes a butterfly!

You may think I’m  a bit obsessed with the butterfly and I’ll admit I probably am.  But it’s only because of what it symbolizes.  True strength, determination, rebirth, and courage.  We need all of these things in order to get over the hurt or pain we are suffering from.    Just like the caterpillar, we also need the proper conditions in which to transform.  I was given a very big gift during my difficult time and was placed along side many people who helped me through every difficult day.  Those were the conditions I needed to begin my transformation.

Make sure you are surrounding yourself with family, love and time for yourself to reflect on what you are going through.  Seek out the tools you need in order to continue your transformation.  Maybe it’s just quiet time to journal, or maybe it’s surrounding yourself with friends.  Only you know what YOU need in order to continue your transformation and be able to grow and move through any pain you are feeling.

Next time you think you have reached your maximum and you can’t push any further, remember that like the caterpillar you too are a survivor!

Courageous Butterfly

1/28/12