I have had an amazing butterfly experience! As I mentioned previously, I was able to bring home two caterpillars in the hopes of being able to be part of their transformation. I am happy to report that I was able to observe every stage, and at times I felt myself going through every change right along with them.
Exciting times when a girl gets to bring home a couple of caterpillars, and the moment I carried them through the door was the beginning of a whole new set of experiences. Little did I know, it was also the beginning of a new set of emotions as well.
It took just two days before they headed to the top of the cup and attached themselves to the lid. It is in this spot where they would hunker down and prepare for the inevitable. Because they were in such a confined space, they really didn’t have much of a choice as to where they could go and safely transform. Being able to hatch and release butterflies in homes or schools is something that has been going on a for a while, but it still didn’t change the fact, their environment as they knew it, had forever been changed.
I had no idea how that one movement of the caterpillars would remind me of what I experienced at the beginning of my trial. I too was forced to hunker down in a confined space . It was not my choice; my emotions and peace of mind were not safe; and the environment as I knew it, was about to be forever changed.
Just two days after the chrysalis was completely formed I was able to remove the lid and 
hang it in the hatching habitat. During this process one of the chrysalis’ came loose and fell to the bottom. I immediately reached for my instructions to find out what to do. The instructions were to gently scoop it up with a spoon and place it on a paper towel. It said most likely the butterfly would still be able to hatch without any damage. Needless to say, worry was setting in.
Once I really thought about what the caterpillar may be going through, I was brought back to a moment when I was curled up in a ball in the corner of my kitchen, hoping I would come out of my experience without any damage.
Once in the chrysalis the caterpillars will hatch within 7-10 days, and I made sure to keep an accurate count. I was even able to set up a butterfly web cam so I wouldn’t miss a trick! Guess what? I missed two tricks! The first butterfly emerged prior to the camera being set up, this was the one at the bottom of the habitat. I was so happy to see it had survived, that it eased my disappointment in not witnessing it. Knowing the second one was just a day behind I stayed close by the web cam. Just as a little kid knows when you are watching, this butterfly took a 7 minute window in the 30 minutes I had been away from the camera to come into our world. Luckily for me the web cam took photos of movement and I was able to view it after the fact.
Excitement mounted high for me, knowing I was going to sleep that night with butterflies in my room and in the same moment, sadness set in knowing they would soon be released. I knew all along that would be the outcome, but a part of me wanted to hang onto them forever if I could.
For a very long time I wanted to hold on to the feelings I had for my ex. I felt sadness knowing that someday those feelings would no longer exist and a part of me wanted to cling to them. The sane part of me knew that releasing the energy surrounding these feelings was the best thing I could do in order to heal. Instead of holding on, I was able to finally release and let it go just as I would have to with the butterflies.
When I wrote Out of The Chrysalis; Free to Fly I thought I had fully experienced the similarities of the caterpillar during transformation. The witness of this metamorphosis, has shown me that my book was just the beginning of fully understanding, not only the caterpillars experience, but also my own.
Stay tuned for the conclusion of the butterflies journey in my next post Accepting Transformation part 2.
Have you been able to see similarities in life situations? Please share in the comments.
Courageous Butterfly 4/27/17
Kimberly
Tomorrow I run! My first 5K of the season and third all time. I’m no Forrest Gump but I will do my best. The path is unknown I will have to look for the route markers and stay the course. I will need to delve deep into my energy reserves, focus on my breathing, concentrate on my surroundings, and eventually cross the finish line. If you close your eyes and repeat the italicized text, I promise you can apply that to any life experience.
Results are good, everything checks out except for the following: There are trivial amounts of an abnormality and the source is unknown. You may go about your normal daily activities.
Today’s forecast is clear with a minimal chance of precipitation. The temperature is 70 but with the wind chill may feel like 40. I suggest a light jacket and an umbrella just to be safe. There is a small craft warning until your storm blows over. Take all necessary precautions while traveling to ensure your safety.
Just when you think things are getting better, it happens AGAIN! Of course, we know that is what life is all about. The ups, the downs, the happy as well as sad. I had spent an entire year preparing for something that was to have taken place last weekend, but I was struck down with the flu virus. And not just the 24 hour or even 4 day flu, it was the 7 day tied to the couch illness. One week from receiving my flu shot of course. But the flu is not the purpose for this post today, it is learning that when we are fighting a foe, patience isn’t always the easiest.
Many of the outcomes of my divorce were surprises to me and not what I had expected or anticipated, just at this past weekend. However, the divorce produced new life, new change and a chance to grow and strengthen, as well as this past weekend. I’m seeing a pattern here. Both of these instances were successes in my life and should not be seen as anything less. This time I could see it quicker and more clearly because I knew what to look for.
Ok, here goes nothing! Those were my thoughts this afternoon as she headed to my way. At first I thought I was dreaming.
Remember that age-old question that we were all asked when upon high school graduation and even during some job interviews? “Where do you see yourself in 5, 10, 20, 25…years?” I totally answered mine wrong, if we were graded on that I would’ve flunked out! Thank goodness those hopes and aspirations are not written in stone, therefore we can change them any time we want! But when we are forced to change them, that’s when it get’s tricky.
working on a literal path just yesterday right in the place that I thought I’d never be. Here I am and I’m a survivor! I didn’t know it was happening but I have embraced this very difficult change, faced it head on and I am rocking it! It is becoming clear that just because I thought I made the wrong decision, doesn’t make it wrong. It may just mean that the purpose I thought it was supposed to fill in my life was not what I envisioned.