NO! That is not my biological clock ticking, it is the constant pounding sound of the love clock which is buried deep within me somewhere. Sometimes it is extremely loud and other times I can’t even hear it, but I know it is there, I’m just not so sure if I should be watching it or just let time run its course.
TICK….TICK….TICK…annoying isn’t it?
I am CERTAINLY not an expert on relationships and I hope that I never will be, life without that mystery would be really boring! I watched a movie last night called the Timer, and it really got me thinking….sometimes good, sometimes not so good….but I decided to keep that thinking going and after a while it kind of made some sense. My last post talked about finding our soul mate, is it possible? Perhaps….Can we be patient? Most of us would say no…we want to know right now if we have found that ONE.
The timer in the movie is a clock that was implanted in the arms of someone over the age of 14. They all started with a zeroed out clock, at some point the clock starts working and gives you a count down of when you will meet your soul mate. When two souls that are meant for each other meet, their clocks simultaneously zero out again, Most people succumb to the pressure of needing that clock, constantly watching it to see when and where they will meet the love of their lives, while other’s protest it and only look for those who are timer-less. Some even go as far as having it removed because they can’t handle the fact it has been zero for so long and they are sure they don’t have a soul mate out there.
At first I found the movie a bit off the wall, but it started to feel so real to me after a while. There was a period of time when the lead thought she had found her soul mate in a timer-free man even though he had not started the count down on hers, but it didn’t stop her from just living in the moment all the while thinking she was falling in love with him.
She thought she was happy and went to have her timer removed believing she had met her soul mate and that the timers were a farce. Just as they were reaching out for her arm to do the removal her clock started counting down. Now she was faced with a choice…..ignore it and stay happy with whom she had found, or have faith in the clock and wait it out for her ONE to find her. THAT was the moment it all became real for me!
So many people go through there lives knowing that they have their one and only, I was pretty sure I had in my ex, but then there are those who continue to wander aimlessly looking, hoping, praying, and unfortunately settling. Not to say that settling is all that bad, as I learned in the movie she was pretty darn happy with the timer-less love, but her soul wasn’t, and the sound of that inner clock beating on her heart was a constant reminder that she needed to wait out her clock.
Happy ending of course, as the two soul mates came together their eyes locked and both timer’s zeroed out, however it was a movie. So can this really happen, not having timer’s shoved into our arms, but can we really meet the one whom we are destined to be with and when we do will we KNOW we have found them?
I am feeling mighty faithful this morning and I am more than ready to go ahead and keep listening to my inner timer even though at times that clicking sound may seem like nails on a chalkboard, it will stop someday and then I’LL know. My fuse is lit and I will not douse it on my own, I will wait when the time is right it will put itself out.
Do not give up my fellow singles, that someone is out there listening to their clock and when the time is right you will both zero out together.
Can you hear your clock? Will you have the patience to wait for the real deal? I’d love to hear your thoughts.
Kimberly
Courageous Butterfly
2/15/15
Related links/posts
One, Ed Sheeran
True Love, My Thoughts, My World, My Blog
Settling, Life After HerAffairs
Interesting post Kimberly.
A little while ago I decided I was going to cease “looking”/dating. Began to feel I wasn’t ready – decided I may never again be ready.
This month is extremely difficult for me. It is the month when my divorce was final and the month when my former spouse told me of his infidelity and wanting OUT.
I have been experiencing flashbacks to both of those events. The craziness of his pulling up in a rental car at the courthouse and waving furiously at my friend and myself. As if he was there for some sort of homecoming. It was so very ODD. Then flashbacks of the day he told me he wanted out and did not intend on returning to WI but was heading straight to TX to be with his “love”. Actually – he didn’t say love – in fact I will never forget asking him if he loved her and his response was – “I think so.” Did he say that thinking it would somehow alleviate my pain or was he truly unsure? Who knows! I’m just really sick of going over this again and again in my head and in my dreams. Looking forward to March! Hoping it is simply a February thing.
I also hope that I do not have to go through this for another 5 years. I’ve read that for every 5 years of marriage it will take a year to get over a divorce. If that holds true for me that will mean 8 years.
I hope that in less than 5 years I will again be able to trust another man as much as I trusted my former spouse. However – realistically I may never again get to a place of complete trust with a man. I have it with a few of my lady friends – but I have a feeling – finding the strength to again trust a man completely will be difficult if not impossible.
I started dating again after a friend of mine who had become a Widow found a man shortly after she began dating. I have since begun to believe she is not necessarily doing the right thing by becoming involved so soon. After meeting this man – and watching them together – I think perhaps both of them are attempting to replace the partners they lost. He is a Widower whose wife died from Cancer just like my friends husband did. They have little in common – and it seems she wants to change him – a lot. I do not believe that is a good match. It certainly is not what I want in a relationship.
Because I have now seen them together – I have become more content with my own life. If I happen upon love again – GREAT! However – I have ceased looking for it. I have decided it is best to become happy with myself and my life in general.
Blessings,
Phyllis
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Phyllis, thank you for sharing your thoughts. I agree that the dating world can be a very hard thing to deal with after divorce survival. I was also told the same about how long it takes to get over it and at first I thought they were crazy, but now I can see that it makes a whole lot of sense.
You are doing great if you know that you are not ready and you are sticking to that and I applaud you for that. Good job girl!
Kimberly
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