I have had an amazing butterfly experience! As I mentioned previously, I was able to bring home two caterpillars in the hopes of being able to be part of their transformation. I am happy to report that I was able to observe every stage, and at times I felt myself going through every change right along with them.
Exciting times when a girl gets to bring home a couple of caterpillars, and the moment I carried them through the door was the beginning of a whole new set of experiences. Little did I know, it was also the beginning of a new set of emotions as well.
It took just two days before they headed to the top of the cup and attached themselves to the lid. It is in this spot where they would hunker down and prepare for the inevitable. Because they were in such a confined space, they really didn’t have much of a choice as to where they could go and safely transform. Being able to hatch and release butterflies in homes or schools is something that has been going on a for a while, but it still didn’t change the fact, their environment as they knew it, had forever been changed.
I had no idea how that one movement of the caterpillars would remind me of what I experienced at the beginning of my trial. I too was forced to hunker down in a confined space . It was not my choice; my emotions and peace of mind were not safe; and the environment as I knew it, was about to be forever changed.
Just two days after the chrysalis was completely formed I was able to remove the lid and 
hang it in the hatching habitat. During this process one of the chrysalis’ came loose and fell to the bottom. I immediately reached for my instructions to find out what to do. The instructions were to gently scoop it up with a spoon and place it on a paper towel. It said most likely the butterfly would still be able to hatch without any damage. Needless to say, worry was setting in.
Once I really thought about what the caterpillar may be going through, I was brought back to a moment when I was curled up in a ball in the corner of my kitchen, hoping I would come out of my experience without any damage.
Once in the chrysalis the caterpillars will hatch within 7-10 days, and I made sure to keep an accurate count. I was even able to set up a butterfly web cam so I wouldn’t miss a trick! Guess what? I missed two tricks! The first butterfly emerged prior to the camera being set up, this was the one at the bottom of the habitat. I was so happy to see it had survived, that it eased my disappointment in not witnessing it. Knowing the second one was just a day behind I stayed close by the web cam. Just as a little kid knows when you are watching, this butterfly took a 7 minute window in the 30 minutes I had been away from the camera to come into our world. Luckily for me the web cam took photos of movement and I was able to view it after the fact.
Excitement mounted high for me, knowing I was going to sleep that night with butterflies in my room and in the same moment, sadness set in knowing they would soon be released. I knew all along that would be the outcome, but a part of me wanted to hang onto them forever if I could.
For a very long time I wanted to hold on to the feelings I had for my ex. I felt sadness knowing that someday those feelings would no longer exist and a part of me wanted to cling to them. The sane part of me knew that releasing the energy surrounding these feelings was the best thing I could do in order to heal. Instead of holding on, I was able to finally release and let it go just as I would have to with the butterflies.
When I wrote Out of The Chrysalis; Free to Fly I thought I had fully experienced the similarities of the caterpillar during transformation. The witness of this metamorphosis, has shown me that my book was just the beginning of fully understanding, not only the caterpillars experience, but also my own.
Stay tuned for the conclusion of the butterflies journey in my next post Accepting Transformation part 2.
Have you been able to see similarities in life situations? Please share in the comments.
Courageous Butterfly 4/27/17
Kimberly
I was all set to call it a night, I leaned over to turn off the light and my body paused. I looked at the lamp and was reminded that I still carry pieces of my past with me. As I embark on yet another move, I am determined to let go of these items that have lingered in places where they really didn’t need to be.
You can’t forget life and you can’t undo what’s been done. What you can do is learn, grow and survive. I know in the coming weeks as I continue to pack I will most likely stumble across more things that I thought I had let go of. I will put on my wings and FINALLY set the items free. Lightening the load will make it much easier for me to move both physically and emotionally.
This week will mark the five year anniversary of my divorce. Needless to say my emotions are all over the place. December is a tough month, we would have been married 25 years and then toss in Christmas. Divorced and married in the same month does not bode well in the healing process.
Out of the Chrysalis 