Tag: getting on with life

What An Awesome God

Published on by Kimberly Novak1 Comment

It is no secret how I feel about Christian Worship music, especially songs written by Phil Wickham. God has always used music as a way to speak to my heart. Sometimes the lyrics have given me little warnings of something on the horizon. At other times, the music serves as a means for God to comfort me, filling me with love and joy.

A few weeks ago, I downloaded Phil’s newest song, “What An Awesome God,” and within seconds, my toes began to tap, my shoulders started swaying, and before I knew it, my arms were reaching to the clouds in praise to our Heavenly Father.

After listening to the lyrics, I was completely at peace, and I knew that God was about to do something miraculous in my life. It has been a year and five months since my traumatic brain injury, and my healing journey has been full of ups and downs. I am one of the lucky ones; I have been left with only mild side effects. Still, though, I have been dealing with what seemed like one new diagnosis after another.

In a previous post, I wrote about the visions I experienced while in the hospital, where Jesus’ crown floated around my room. Since then, I have been praying over and over again about what a wonderful gift I received. Not just the gift of life, but the chance to see the face of Jesus through the vision of His crown.

This Lent, our church allowed venerating the crucifix. This, I pondered, is my moment. My chance to give Jesus all of my bodily pain, my tears, and my love. Perhaps this is the moment God had in mind all along. I didn’t even think, as my turn at the cross arrived. I reached my hands and touched the crown on Jesus’ head, and gently kissed Him right where I feel my pain. Tears of joy and hope fell from my eyes, and I praised my Awesome God for the gift of life both now and in eternity. Life, given to me by the sacrifice of His only Son.

My head pain subsided the next day. I didn’t want to react too quickly, thinking maybe I was just having a good day. As the weeks went by, though, I knew I had been healed. Or the medication I was given was finally working. Either way, I was grateful.

Fast forward to a month ago when I faced yet another diagnosis. Here we go, I thought. God took one thing away, and now I’ll get something new. I allowed myself to grieve health in a sense, but then turned to prayer. God showed up big time! In the process of diagnostic testing, I had to stop taking the headache medication for a few days. I was sure the pain would be more than I could bear, but I had no choice if we were to get to the bottom of another possible health crisis.

It has been one week since I stopped that medication, and I have had no headache! Proof positive that God healed my pain as I kissed Jesus’ head on Good Friday! It is also an answer to the prayers of many people who have been praying earnestly on my behalf. Also praiseworthy is that the new diagnosis they were testing me for came back negative! I see this as an opportunity given to me by God to go off that medication. He knew I didn’t need it anymore, but he had to show me. He used the laboratory tests as a way to do that.

God has always been very creative in the ways he gets my attention! And I love it when he uses Phil’s music to do so. If you’re looking for some praise music that may be life-changing, put on your dancing shoes and sing along with Phil…
“My God, You’re an awesome God
You’re great in all You do
I’m made to worship You
My God, You’re an awesome God!”

A Beloved Daughter of God Set Free

Published on by Kimberly NovakLeave a comment

“See what the Father has given us, that we should be called children of God; and that is what we are.” 

1 John 3:1 (NRSV)

I attended an UNBOUND conference recently, and the blessings I received during and after have been life-changing. UNBOUND is a model of prayer for healing and deliverance from Neal Lozano and Heart of the Father Ministries.  

The real treat for me was that Father Boniface Hicks, OSB, a Benedictine monk of Saint Vincent Archabbey, a Catholic priest, and the Director of Spiritual Formation and the Institute for Ministry Formation at Saint Vincent Seminary, presented the content for the day.

I have become familiar with Father Boniface through the opportunity to write book reviews for two of his authored and co-authored books with CatholicMom.com. In his writings and video courses, Father’s gentle and thoughtful ways of praying always captivate my heart. I knew signing up for a conference he spoke at would not disappoint!

I went into the conference with little information on UNBOUND, but knowing Father Boniface’s background, I had high expectations. The day’s agenda allowed every participant to experience and immediately put into practice a life-changing model of prayer. A simple definition of UNBOUND is that it is a well-balanced and easy-to-follow teaching method as long as one has an open heart and is ready to surrender everything to our Lord.

As for me, I am made new! That day, I left a lot of baggage in the church hall, mixed in with healing tears and the full knowledge that I am a beloved daughter of God the Father. I am more equipped to apply the Gospel to my life and have renewed faith in allowing God to run the ship!

It is amazing and much easier to see ourselves as God sees us when we make room for His love by renouncing and taking authority over spirits that ultimately bring us down. Additional key takeaways from attending an UNBOUND conference are:

·       Pain deserves to be repaired, no matter what has caused it; all you need to do is permit Jesus to do His work.

·       God never forgets, hears all our prayers, and knows our hearts.

·       When we struggle with something, it is the enemy trying to undo what God has done.

·       We are meant to bless each other!

·       True identity is found in the heart of God.

I recommend attending an UNBOUND conference or scheduling an appointment with a group in your area. You will have no regrets, transformation will ensue, and you will feel God’s love. God has already planned for you to check it out, just as He planned for you to read this program review. Don’t hesitate; let God steady the ship and take you on his chartered course.

If you have attended an UNBOUND conference or session, I welcome you to share your thoughts in the comments.

Blessings,

Kimberly

Informational Links:

Neal Lozano and Heart of the Father Ministries.  

Father Boniface

https://www.fatherboniface.org/wordpresshome/monastic-musings/

CatholicMom.com.

www.kimberlynovak.com

Something Better

Published on by Kimberly Novak8 Comments

“As the rain and the snow
come down from heaven,
and do not return to it
without watering the earth
and making it bud and flourish,
so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,
so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
It will not return to me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire
and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.”

ISAIAH 55:10-11

In this verse from Isaiah, the “rain” and the “dew” are the grace of God, preparing the heart; the seed is God’s truth found in the written word; and you and I are the “Sower,” the servant of our Lord.  It does not get better in the season I find myself in than this passage.  

Today, I celebrate the five-month mark of my traumatic brain injury.  I still get chills when I say those four words. Every day during the two weeks I spent in the ICU, I was asked to identify myself by name and birthdate and then tell them why I was in the hospital.  I knew at the time they were monitoring my cognitive abilities, but it was emotionally painful repeating “brain bleed” daily. 

Now, five months later, I have graduated, calling it a TBI or traumatic brain injury. Somehow, it doesn’t sound as scary.  I have made significant progress in this short time. Today, I began my first day off of a couple of medications and received word that my recent scans do not show signs of a brain aneurysm.  God is good! 

A few weeks ago, I gifted myself a short retreat focused on art and spirituality.  Ironically, it was held in the place where my injury occurred. I’ve read accounts from some who cannot return to the place where their TBI took place. I, however, was grateful that God rescued me in that place and was eager to return, knowing God would hold me close.

“When I let go of inhibitions and allow God’s hands upon mine, creativity becomes a prayer. Every brushstroke becomes a song of the heart, praising the One who gave me life.” Something Better by Kimberly Novak

I had hoped that by being in my “happy place,” I could understand what happened and where I am now.  I succeeded to some extent, but there is a part of me that wonders where I would be if the TBI had not occurred and where God is taking me now. There are deficits, such as mental focus, and for some reason, I struggle with decision-making. Changing my mind has become a habit of late.  In all of the medical mess, they have found a very rare artery disease for which there is no cure. God’s light is the only thing that will help me navigate the specifics of what is yet to come and the only way I can comfortably enter.

I can find little blessings woven in between each diagnosis. If the brain event had not taken place, they would not know that I have so much going on in my arteries.  Now, I know my limitations and how to protect myself best. It will take patience and discernment, but I know I will get to the “something better” God is calling me toward. I’d imagine the caterpillar feels the same way once it realizes what God has in store.  

I miss my writing, but I am happy to say that I completed my first writing assignment just this week. Focusing on sharing God’s light and love through the written word felt so good. The post you are reading now will become my second attempt at getting words on the page. Forgive me if I ramble or go in circles. It’s just God rewiring my brain.

I have days when it feels like I’m not who I once was in my headspace. God’s sense of humor shines through when I reflect on my obsession with the caterpillar’s transformation into a butterfly. Days creep in when I want to go back to before January 18, 2024, and live in that brain again. Those are the moments when I turn to Jesus and prepare for something better. 

Only God knows what my future holds. There are a few things I do know.  God saved me in my place of peace. The Word of God will achieve its purpose. God’s ways are above mine. God has a purpose for me to accomplish before I unite with Him in His Heavenly Kingdom. God is not done with me yet.

“It will not return to me empty but will accomplish what I desire and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.”

Isaiah 55:11

Will there be difficulties ahead? You bet! I have always been able to find God in all things. My job now is to find God’s peace in all things. Finding a “comfortable” place in the medical mess can only be good. I will enjoy the gifts and promptings of the Holy Spirit as my guide in the next several months and celebrate every month as a milestone and a new breath of life.

Focusing so much on monthly milestones and celebrating being saved in my place of peace may seem silly. However, I consider them a blessing more significant than some might imagine. Every time I walk through the hallowed walls, where the prayers are embedded, I will remember God’s saving Grace. In the moments I spend on the hallowed grounds, I will praise God for restoration and new beginnings, always looking forward to something better.